I have been planning this trip on and off since January. Shaklee has been gracious enough to invite me out to their annual global conference to recognize my achievements on stage. About a month ago I finally talked myself into committing to going not just for all of the training and growing I could personally use, but because I know I need to set the example for my rapidly growing team!
While I am honored and so incredibly excited, I am also worried about leaving my baby girl for the first time. She has never stayed with anyone for longer than a couple of hours at a time, so I am nervous for her. I think I will be fine. I know all mama’s need a break from time to time, and so I welcome the chance to grow and dance with friends in Vegas, but I am nervous that she will not understand and will miss me being with her 24-7.
As a work at home mom, I have to get use to traveling a little more now. There will be Blissdom in Dallas come March and other speaking engagements I have arranged as well. But I am still fearful.
The shootings this morning in Wisconsin have me even more rattled. I can’t shake the “what-ifs”. What if Elizabeth gets sick or hurt while I’m gone. Worse, what if something tragic happens to me on my travels? While I have complete and total faith that this is what God has called me to do right now, and while I know that if it’s my day to go – it won’t matter if I’m home playing with my baby or in Vegas, those thoughts still creep up.
Will Elizabeth know how much I love her? Will she remember all of the snuggles and the 10,000 books I’ve read? Will she remember the crazy hours we spend dancing around the house jamming out to “Jesus loves me” radio on Pandora? Will she remember the prayer I pray over her bed every night when I lay her down? Will she miss the midnight visits to her room just to make sure she is okay one last time? Will she continue to be fed good, whole foods? Will she remember the sound of my voice when I’ve sung “You are my Sunshine” for the millionth time? Will she remember the way I smell when we take a bubble bath together? Will she know how much she’s changed me? Will she know how much I love her?
Like I said, I know that God is in control, and I am sure that everything will be fine! I will go and learn and cross more achievements off my list, and Lord willing, return home next Sunday to a little girl happy to see her mama!
Hope you all have a great week, too!!! I have a couple of fun posts lined up for you! Including one BIG post I wrote exclusively for Allora Handmade! Eeek!
while you’re here, check out: